A THOUSAND THANKS
THE NEFF ZONE -- BY JIM NEFF
CADILLAC NEWS -- NOVEMBER 2, 2024
Realizing my math skills are sketchy at best, by my count this is Neff Zone column number one thousand. The column has been rolling along for about twenty years. I tell people that the column has been around so long that half the town thinks I'm an institution. The other half thinks I belong in an institution.
I'm often asked how I come up with all the things that comprise a column. The simple answer is that I am in a constant discovery mode. Since I am not bound by a single subject area, I scour sources for items that interest me. I figure if something intrigues me it might also do the same for you. Sorting through material is pretty much a continuous process. I throw away about ninety-five percent of what I personally research.
Plus, I have a stealth research team (brother Big Rob, other family members, friends, and readers). I receive a steady stream of ideas and material.
In essence, I have a simple goal for the column. My hope is that you'll find something in the Neff Zone that will make you smile. If I accomplish that, all my efforts are worthwhile.
So, thanks to Managing Editor Matt Seward and Publisher Chris Huckle at the Cadillac News for providing me this opportunity. Thanks to my family for putting up with my semi-creative obsession. Most of all, thanks to everyone who has read even one column. I am beyond grateful.
Enough about me. Onward to a few items that might have a chance to make you smile.
The NFL season is in full swing, so the subject of snacks is paramount. However, as you're enjoying your tailgate treats, have you given any thought as to what the players are munching during halftimes?
Odd as it may seem, the classic PB&J is a top choice. “The New York Times sports outlet learned that many players opted to pass on the citrus fruit and instead munch on another kid-friendly favorite: Uncrustables. That set The Athletic on a mission to find out just how many of the sealed crustless peanut butter and jelly sandwiches get eaten. The outlet learned that the players easily go through at least eighty thousand Uncrustables a year.”
Big appetites mean big consumption. “In a breakdown by team, the Denver Broncos handily topped the list, consuming seven thousand of the sandwiches a week. Kansas City Chiefs tight end Travis Kelce revealed that he eats more of the sandwiches than anything else in the world." (https://people.com/nfl-players-eat-at-least-80000-uncrustables-a-year-8734457)
National Cat Week begins tomorrow, so a cat fact is in order. Cats may be liquid. “Cats may seem solid, but they’re actually somewhat liquid — at least according to one theoretical physics paper inspired by videos of cats squeezing under doors, into tight vases and down narrow crevices. Now, one researcher has taken this idea a step further, physically testing dozens of cats to see when they act more like liquids or solids.”
The science is beyond me, but the research is there. “Cats fluidly move through tall and narrow nooks. The finding suggests that cats are aware of their own body sizes and may form mental images of themselves.” (https://www.sciencenews.org/article/home-experiments-cats-liquid-behavior)
While celebrating cats, don't forget about your dogs. With cold weather coming on, you may want to include a new product on your doggy shopping list. “Crocs for pets are officially here! The brand worked with BARK, the dog subscription service, to create a protective yet adorable design. The all-new Pet Crocs are comfy and breathable EVA foam booties made for stylish walks all year round.”
Better yet, you and your Fido can now be stylish together. “Along with Pet Crocs, the brand has launched a limited edition style of its Classic Lined Clog so you can match with your furry friend. The styles come in two colors, green and pink, and feature a marbled glow-in-the-dark pattern.” See at: https://www.goodmorningamerica.com/shop/story/crocs-dogs-exist-matching-114852258.
Something that blends the animal kingdom with a human activity is the Flamingo Challenge. “Recent research suggests that, more than any other activity, a person’s ability to stand on one leg changes with age. It appears to be the first fitness marker to go. Scientists think that’s because it uses so many different parts of the brain and body at once. So, how long can you stand on one leg like a flamingo?”
Here's how it works. “You have to stand on one leg with your hands on your hips and keep your eyes open. The timer starts as soon as your foot lifts off the ground and stops when you either lower your foot or take your hands off your hips.” (https://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/entry/stand-on-one-leg-duration-by-age_uk_671f63d6e4b0a55cb4cda5bf)
Here are the measurements. If you’re fifty to fifty-nine it's thirty-seven seconds. For sixty to sixty-nine it's thirty seconds. It's between eighteen and nineteen seconds if you’re aged seventy to seventy-nine, and a little over five seconds if you’re over eighty. (https://suffolkandnortheastessex.icb.nhs.uk/news/how-long-can-you-stand-like-a-flamingo/)
Finally, once again thanks to all for reading the Neff Zone columns. With your indulgence and patience, I'll strive to fulfill the words of my favorite author. Mark Twain said: “It takes a heap of sense to write good nonsense.”
Jim Neff is a local columnist. Read Neff Zone columns online at CadillacNews.com and Neffzone.com/cadillacnews.
